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madeleine

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(5 scarlet begonias | leave something)

[22 Jul 2007|11:08pm]
Theories has made me a reading machine. HP done in 5 hours.

(1 scarlet begonia | leave something)

[08 Jul 2007|03:59pm]
Today, I wore my "YELLOW FEVER" Rochester spirit shirt and my "SARS" dance sweatpants to the gym. It occured to me as I was walking out of the Galleria that I was extremely offensive to the Asian community.

Work is tolerable. WoW has taken over my life. I just need to get back to Rochester and I'll be ok.

(3 scarlet begonias | leave something)

[14 Jun 2007|12:16am]
I should update sometime soon. Or something.

I got to see Angie! That was the highlight of my last few weeks.

And that's about it.

(8 scarlet begonias | leave something)

i park my car outside your house//hoping someday you'll come home [03 Jun 2007|12:57pm]
[ mood | aggravated ]

So last night was weird. Somehow, this job has not been as stressful as Ultrazone, and I really think that the lack of screaming kids has a lot to do with it. While there is an element of time pressure (giving quotes to customers) at Sisley, it's just...not the same. It's hard to describe, and certainly doesn't exist at UZ anymore because of the new version, but when you're in the vesting room...you're trying to download the packs...you have about 3 minutes to do that and get the other game vested up and in the damn game...and you have forty 9 year olds screaming their team color...I dunno. That was stressful. Sisley, in comparison, is...boring.

Anyway: we had a crap load of reservations. And they were really large groups, for the most part. So anyone else that came in had to wait. I'm not allowed to give quotes of time (which I appreciate; that means only managers get screamed at). Well, due to a snafu with the floor plan (and I apologize to anyone who hasn't worked in a restaurant and does not get this lingo), we had servers picking up tables all over the fucking place and we (Rodrigo and I) had no earthly idea what was going on. So my managers (Rodrigo and Joanna) start getting into a fight. It's bad when I am the most professional and I've only been working there for like, thirty seconds. That was slightly awkward and I just wanted them to FIX THE FUCKING PROBLEM instead of argue with each other. To make matters even more spectacular, the female owner (husband and wife own it together), Fran, came in, and went to the host stand. She's notorious for freaking out at people, and thus far I've been lucky to avoid her ire. I went into CrazyPartyMomMode and dealt with it...I dunno. I got through it unscathed, but again, it was a spectacularly unpleasant time.

And my favorite part? The fact that I am apparently not wearing enough/the right kind of makeup. I DON'T KNOW HOW THEY WANT ME TO WEAR MY MAKEUP, and I have no idea how to apply the sort of makeup that they want. So I told my manager that if I come in today looking like a drag queen, it's gonna be her fault. Chuckles all around.

I need to get paid ASAP so I can buy comfty shoes and so I can buy something that isn't black. Ugh. Only two months of this and then I can go back to Rochester.

(1 scarlet begonia | leave something)

with hands held high into a sky so blue... [02 Jun 2007|11:58am]
[ mood | drained ]

In the last few days, I...

- had my car broken into and my purse and wallet stolen (bastards charged a shit load of money on my cards)
- got the most high I have ever been (and I don't think I EVER want to be that high again)
- went and saw Tim at his show (which was great)
- was at the concert the same time with Mark (which was slightly awkward)
- worked my first double shift (which was painful)

I am actually working a straight week, Monday through Sunday. I need the money, because I need to buy new shoes, so I don't want to kill myself every night after my shift, and clothes too so I don't look like I'm constantly attending funerals. Oh well. Just gotta get through two months of this. I should start working on Latin and Greek so I don't lose it, but we will see what happens. My running has been derailed because my feet hurt so bad/I am so exhausted after work that I just can't bring myself to run. However, because of my dumb schedule at work, I barely eat these days, so...wait, there's no way to justify that shit. I need to eat more.

Hopefully, if everything goes well, Nate will come visit LA in August, and then I will go back early to visit Nate and go see Projekt Revolution at the 'Cuse for the NY State Fair, and then do orientation with the churrrleaders, turn 21 (and have the best birthday in three years, because let's face it: the last three have ranged from mediocre to suck), and then start senior year. CRAZY.

(1 scarlet begonia | leave something)

[30 May 2007|01:28am]
Nice evening. Saw Max for the first time in three years.

And now I just revamped my myspace and am now slightly in tears (and really embarressed to admit it).

Tomorrow night should be fun. And I still can't decide if I really mean that or am being heavily sarcastic.

(2 scarlet begonias | leave something)

[28 May 2007|09:23pm]
ARGH. I AM NOT A HAPPY GIRL RIGHT NOW.

But! Work went well, I work again tomorrow (and probably all week). Until I can lose myself in my job, I will just be annoyed/sad.

More importantly: If Joss Whedon likes Revenge of the Sith, as this documentary causes me to suspect, then it obviously can't be that bad (anyone who = SW fan, READ THE NOVELIZATION OF THE THIRD NEW MOVIE KTHXBAI).

(4 scarlet begonias | leave something)

O HAY GUSY [28 May 2007|09:24am]
[ mood | nervous ]

So I start my new job today. I am a hostess at a local, somewhat upscale restaurant, and I hope I don't embarress myself. What's funny is that I am less worried about how I will do and more about how I will work. I have to actually wear MAKEUP so that people KNOW I am wearing it and I can only wear black, gray, or navy blue. This normally wouldn't be a problem but most of the stuff I would wear is at the dry cleaners because it just got back from Ireland. So now, what I'm wearing is kinda hilarious. I'll try to take a picture of it because I look so ridiculous (my mom says I look fine but I think she's being nice). I will be so pissed if I get fired because my pants are too baggy. Wah. I just need to get a paycheck and then I can go shopping. Or maybe I can convince Dominique to lend me money and I can pay her back when I get paid. Ugh. I hate being nervous because of my apperance! That's why I liked Vest Tech at Ultrazone. I was in black light. And that was the shit.

Oh well. More important question(s): how do you know when you've fallen in love? How would you define love (and I mean this in the romantic sense, not filial or platonic)?

Hopefully I will not have to work too late on Wednesday, meaning I can get to Tim's show on time (hopefully with a pre-sale ticket, oh please oh please oh please). But if I work until 10 and then show up at 10:30, I'll be just in time to see them. Then I can give Tim a hug, meet his girlfriend and the rest of his band, and then say bye bye and go home. Makes the whole awkward thing disappear. Slightly, anyway.

WISH ME LUCK.

(3 scarlet begonias | leave something)

[24 May 2007|09:13am]
So, I'm sorta busy, but I'm sorta not busy. I am trying to look for work but I also have many hours where I just sit at home and do nothing (actually, I try to play WoW, cos I find that enjoyable). I visited NH the other day on a whim, and it turns out that not only were they testing, the HGM seniors were at Yosemite (and so were Maine and Haut, two of my main reasons for visiting). So obv I have to go back.

Anyway, I've visited UZ twice since I've been back, being very very careful with my timing. I don't think Mark Young really approves of me visiting, so I'm gonna have to try and arrange to see people without being at Ultrazone, but if I have to pick up my sister, I have to pick up my sister. Oh well. My brother and my sister, bless them, keep telling me, though not these exact words, to man up and just do whatever I want. ...I don't think they quite understand either a) that I'm not the one who's making quite the big deal about everything or b) that I'm not the one who might go on a rampage if I were to see my ex. After visiting UZ the first night, and being teased for making UZ miserable for a while, I kind of never want to be partially responsible for that again. Oh well. I actually considered not going to Tim's show for a while, but then I realized that I've known Tim for 5 years and I haven't seen him play in a year, and thus I really really want to see his show. And if Mark has a problem with this, he is going to have to deal.

But it's really okay, because Ultrazone is not my life, and I have other people that care for me and want to see me and don't want to cut me out of their lives. So that's good. If all goes well, I will have two part time jobs and I will be able to still have enough time to raid when I hit level 70 (hahahahahahaha oh good god I'm a nerd). But if eveything in my life goes well, Nate will come visit in August after his research is done and I will go back with him early to visit his family and see Wil(t)son and everything. Sounds relaxing. Dominique has already demanded to go to Disneyland with us and spent five minutes on the phone telling him his new nickname should be "Batty Natty". Dominique makes my life more liveable.

(leave something)

[21 May 2007|04:54pm]
I really want a job. Wah.

(1 scarlet begonia | leave something)

[19 May 2007|07:20am]
Here goes my airport adventure!

(leave something)

[15 May 2007|02:00pm]
DONE!

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[12 May 2007|11:56am]
[ mood | thoughtful ]

I would say my favorite part of Minutes to Midnight is that it just seems like it is a more mature record. The chord structures are different -- in fact, I wouldn't hesitate to guess that if some of the more...non-stereotypical LP songs got played on the radio, people would be completely shocked to learn it was in fact BY LP (In Between in particular, but a lot of the slower songs, too). There are some screaming, raging, IN YOUR FACE songs, but even then, they don't follow the standard LP song structure, and I really can't lay my finger on it. Doubtless some fans will not like this, but as a former musician, it's nice to see an emphasis on the music for once. I actually feel like Mike's flow is better here than on a lot of his Fort Minor album, and that's not a bad thing.

I guess, on the first album especially, there wasn't so much of an emphasis on the band as there was on the singers. I don't feel that way when I listen to M2M. There is less of the standard Chester singing/Mike rapping little pieces or Mike rapping/Chester singing little pieces and more...I don't know, division? If anyone else has this album (something I fear won't happen until Tuesday in the States), let me know.

And I think someone close to the band died, because death seems to be a recurring theme, or at least questioning their own mortality...makes for an interesting record, anyway.

And yes, I am procrastinating for my stupid Greek final. Shit. But I can't wait until the new Maroon5 album comes out. :D

(2 scarlet begonias | leave something)

[11 May 2007|08:48am]
[ mood | predatory ]

Last night I learned that it is hard to write a paper when you feel like you are going to boot.

Now I am learning that it is hard to write a paper when you just don't care anymore. Curses.

Oh well, I just need about 300 - 500 more words (I'll over shoot that, I just know it) and then I just need to do some stuff to the bibliography (like write it, maybe) and then I can print it out and be one step closer to being done with this semester!

I needed the chillness of this year but I also did not the craziness that became Greek. However, after this is done, I can take a nap (YAY NAP) and listen to Linkin Park and do flashcards and generally start enjoying life again.

But only like, for two days, because I plan on freaking the fuck out on Sunday/Monday morning (but I will reward myself with a crepe, yes I will! And probably massive amounts of alcohol). Oh well.

(leave something)

[10 May 2007|04:09pm]
1. Linkin Park album comes out tomorrow in Ireland, but Tuesday for the US.

2. Honors research with Cadorette next semester!

3. ALMOST DONE.

(leave something)

[07 May 2007|12:56pm]
well, while i am kinda annoyed at myself that i've discovered how i can spend WAY TOO MUCH TIME on facebook, it has enabled me to keep in touch and get in touch with people in a way i don't think i would have if i were in rochester.

and i like it.

(2 scarlet begonias | leave something)

[04 May 2007|03:16am]
I owe it to myself to kick ass this next year.

And no amount of crying will ever make anything real again. Time to live in reality and stop pretending.

(5 scarlet begonias | leave something)

what you are doing is screwin' up things inside my head [02 May 2007|12:47pm]
Ahh, procrastination. How I do love thee. Well, today I at least have a plan. Go do Greek homework at IES, come back and procrastinate, and then write 600 more words of my paper, and then procrastinate some more. It should be a good time. At least I feel better cos I am making some headway on this religion paper and I have been doing Greek every day (I AM RECOGNIZING WORDS NOW YIPEE!!!!!).

But the sooner I get all my stuff done, the sooner I go home. To LA. I'm looking forward to my New York City interlude. A lot. It's going to be relatively cheap(er?) than what I thought I would spend and I get to see some family (again) and Nate (hooray) but then I get to go home. "Get to", as if it's some sort of magical privilage.

See, I'm sorta not really looking forward to it.

It's funny because I think that when I went away to college, I lost touch with a lot of people I was close with...for whatever reason. And it seems the friendships I have made in the interim haven't really lasted as much. The people I want to see this summer are people from high school. People from Monarch. People from Ultrazone, but UZ back in the day, when I was the youngest employee. And that makes me happy and excited, happy and excited because people actually want to see me. That's big for me. I dunno why, it just is.

There's one relationship that is over for sure, and one that is, sadly, seemingly on its way out. But that's okay. If I've learned anything from my life and my studies, it's that nothing lasts forever. So maybe this, too, will just be a phase. But who knows. And at this point, though I am still vaguely annoyed, I guess I just don't care anymore or believe in it, at all. If I did, maybe I would have stronger faith in it.

I'll give you an example.

During the school year, a bunch of us are scattered around the country. And I suck (and HATE) the phone, so I rely on AIM/facebook a lot more than I probably should. As a result, I rarely talk to Kaitlyn, as she's busy. I rarely talk to Anna because she's never on AIM. And though Nick is on a fair amount, we never really have anything to talk about. But somehow, when I get home, it doesn't matter because we're still great friends and we have that security, that trust with each other.

But I guess if I don't HAVE that with someone, it just fizzes out. Fizzzzzzzz.

Oh well. C'est la vie, right?

Since I'm gonna be back in a short time, I want to visit NH. Just because I do that sort of thing. If anyone wants to come with me and disrupt Toy's class, let me know.

(1 scarlet begonia | leave something)

i'm like a steppin' razor, better watch my sides [01 May 2007|03:34pm]
[ mood | determined ]

Because I had to lug all my stuff ALL the way to Trinity and then ALL the way up to the 4th floor (5th floor in the states), I'm giving myself of a procrastination break. AWLROIT.

I busted out my Novum Testamentum Graeca et Latine today at Latininist's brunch, and was immeresed in geek love. It was nice.

And now, to attempt to get stuff done on my paper. Ha. Hahahahaha.

(leave something)

and it really makes me wonder if i ever gave a fuck about you and i [01 May 2007|09:57am]
[ mood | aggravated ]

Annnnnnnd scene.

Fuck this, man, I have way too much going for me to get immersed in the stupidness that is my life.

So...who wants to give me a jorb?!

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